Goodbye, goodbye...

I would like to ask you to please observe a moment of silence.......

Ryker is losing his manhood this morning. Husband and Mikey have officially, and respectfully, withdrawn from life today in order to mourn.

Please contribute to your local Humane Society instead of sending flowers. 

Buzz Off!

Look at that face!

That's the face of a puppy that just got stung by bees 5 times on our hike today and was subsequently drugged by Benadryl and pieces of mom's Subway. It was a surprise frontal assault. Those flying little soldiers were sneaky.

From a distance, it probably looked like we were beating our dog. We'd whack the nasty bee's off and start running to get away but they'd follow. He kept trying to hide between my legs to get away because no matter what we did there the little suckers were, attacking. 

I'd probably be laughing more at his current floppiness if I didn't feel so bad for the poor guy.

.....Ok, I'm laughing.

Pensacola, anyone?

Let the pictures speak for themselves...

This was outside a baptist church so large we mistook it for a Super Wal-Mart

Quasimodo: A Timeline

Happy Damn Independence Day Husband.

It's reminiscent of your birthday when you broke your finger, and that random day that started out well and ended up with a canned chicken attack and me treating for shock.

Husband came blasting into the house, swearing at the top of his lungs in the midst of my trifleing experiment (mines on the right... looks deelish, no? They were out of blueberries, stupid store. I was trying to be patriotic, but gave up. My husband is in the Army and I still like our country despite the retards that run it, so it's as patriotic as it gets. Our big celebration for the 4th was taking an early morning nap, and also getting an afternoon one! But I digress...) mad as a hornet. 

Literally. He had just gotten bit by one. 

In.

The.

Face.

His annoyance here was that it looked like a zit on his nose but I still wanted a picture.

Kudos to me for getting the 'before' picture and enabling the coolest progression timeline of facial swelling EVAH!!

3 minutes later....

5-8 minutes later.....

14 minutes from bite-time...

I lost track of time here. Actually, I just made those other times up. I have no idea what the times were.

Just like to send a big shout out to Ryker, who was a tremendous help during the process with his continual whining and barking for lack of attention.

You were a real lifesaver, dog.

Another big thanks to our other contributors, namely Cindy-Mom, Web MD and Verizon, for providing the phone service. Much gratitude to Benadryl, which eventually made him groggy enough I could force some Advil on him without too much fight. And to ice packs everywhere.

You sure do save face.

The tortoise-ish, not the hare.

Check this guy out!

I found him on a walk the other day. Isn't he great? I didn't know turtles just strolled around.

I guess the south has a few benefits. The heat index of 115 makes me require reminders.

Church Cruisers

What do the following phrases have in common? 

BRAAAAAAPP 

Ah ha! Ah ha! Ahhh HAAAAA!

Neeerooooooooom

(Singing) In the jungle, the mighty jungle...

AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH

Vroom, vroom, Vroooooom!

We're coming! We're comiiiiiiing!

Collectively, it's everything Husband screamed in joy as we cruised around this weekend in Colorado.

And yes, that's a dress.

Pillow Sneaker Stealer Taker

This picture was taken seconds after husband rolled out of bed. That pillow is husbands, and he rarely moves outside of it's range when he sleeps. Wonder where husband slept all night? So do we. I'm thinking on the very edge of the bed because that's where I end up when Ryker sleeps with us and he decides to cuddle with me.

Oh yeah. That's every. night.

Luckily he switches who he cuddles with from night to night. Sometimes in the middle of the night. The only guarantee is that at least one of us will wake up with a blocked trachea because his body is lying across our neck/face. The other lucky fellow will suffer a punch or two in the jaw from flying limbs, or a butt shot. True story, I've been decked in the face before.

We've recently taken to calling him Bambii. He's incredibly lurpy, don't you think? He's also discovering what fun chasing butterflies is, and all the many ways to push Mom's buttons, like trying to dig into the Lovesac.

This picture was taken when he woke up from a cuddle session with me while I watched Biggest Loser (it's my latest obsession). It's a good thing I'm a hard nose and rarely indulge in such weakness.

Only like every other hour.